Just Who In The Big Blue Fuck Does White Dolemite Think He Is
Actor Writer Director Recording Artist Or Icon
Crazy Fool Whore Bitch Punk Pimp Or Motha Fucka
Or Is He Simply The Creator Of Cinemas Greatest Forgotten Genre Whitexploitation
It’s anyone guess. But we can be sure of of this… it’s been one helluva crazy ass ride that’s touched, or more accurately grazed a lot of lives over the years. A critic had once posed the question “Can this man not be stopped?” It would appear… not.
White Dolemite’s philosophy toward life has always revolved around one inspiring thought. “During life, you can sit in a bar, beer in hand and harp on to your buddies regarding all the crazy ass schemes you’re going to get off the ground. Or, you can drag your wide cookie dough ass off the bar stool and actually ‘do’ something. Actually get out there and make a name for yourself. Leave your mark on the world. Just by the very nature of taking such risks, does mean that the name you might achieve will possibly fall into the ‘frickin dumass’ category. And the mark you leave on the world might be nothing more than an ass print on the bed sheets of a Japoon love hotel. But at least you’ve done “something” At least you‘ve tried.
And with the inspirational speech over and getting down to the brass tacks, there are actually only a handful of truths that drive White Dolemite. Those being cigars, guns, sangria and girls. And a shit ol’ dose of sake for good measure.
“I remember thinking to myself, keep life‘s pleasures simple. Something achievable. A goal that you can actually score. And the quickest route to realising that goal… become a frickin’ movie star! A fucked up… fucked in the ass no holds barred crazy ass gun wielding Sake swillin’ lady lovin’ bitch punk motha lova of a goddam movie star”
And now… countless movies, ladies, broken bones, disgraces, topless disco’s, trashed cars and a few hundred gallons of sangria later, has that philosophy altered at all?
“Not in the frickin’ slightest. Sooner or later, summin‘s going to knock me square on my jelly ass. But until that moment shreds me… I am doing the shredin’. Life is for living man. And if you’re not fucking up a whole shit load of shit along the way… you ain’t living it quite right…”
So… if nothing else, one point has become desperately clear…
The “X”Rated Man… cannot be be stopped…
“Rat shit bat shit dirty ol’ twot, 69 assholes tied up in a knot hooray… lizard shit… FUCK!” GC
Alessandro ‘Saseko’ Motojima
It was purely a chance meeting some 30 odd years ago in Japan between White Dolemite and score composer Alessandro ‘Saseko’ Motojima that has led to one of cinema’s greatest and most combustible working relationships.
“It was the Yamazaki that got me here in the first place having signed a 30 year contract with White Dolemite in a Harijuku dive where I was celebrating the nomination of my song ‘Feeding Frenzy’ for a desperately low rate award. I was the only nomination, and strangely still didn’t win the award. White Dolemite was filming Funabashi Death Blades and looking for someone to take over the role of composer after a bizarre accident at Tokyo Tower had left their production musicless” ASM
That 30 year contract has guaranteed that the arrival of a new White Dolemite motion picture mean’t the arrival of a new Motojima score. The guarantee was in place, but strained at every turn due to the fact that the pair fought artistically and sometimes physically with each other over every single note. Some argue that the in house scraps were worth the risks as every now and then, a new “long lost, forgotten score” will surface to critical acclaim. None more so than Motojima’s score to the seminal “Sendo Senshi”
“He is just driving me frickin’ crazy man… bitch does it on purpose. He goes home, records some utter rubbish and presents it to me with this big ole dumass grin on his boat. An all out war kicks off which is only calmed down once he finally decides to present the true score. He does it again and again. Why do I keep falling for his shit?” WD
Through the years, White Dolemite and Motojima have crossed through, chewed up and spat out many a genre. Begging the question, where do Motojimas influences come from? It’s a difficult question to answer seeing as no one is completely sure of his background. He has a Japanese name yet talks like a Canadian Mountie. You never see his eyes due to his continual habit of wearing shades. He also claims to speak at least 3 languages.
Regardless of the truth behind Motojima’s true identity, what is transparent is the fact that no matter how brutal the wars become, the only certainty is the fact that his latest score is going to rock the very earth to its core.